Just For Men

She’s late… What now?

There are Choices

It is very important for both of you to know that there are options available.

A Caring Place is here to help you in a non-judgmental, loving way.

First Confirm the Pregnancy
Women miss periods for several reasons. It is very important for you and the mother to first determine if this is a viable pregnancy.

Get a blood or urine pregnancy test to confirm she is pregnant.

It could be that you are not actually pregnant. We provide laboratory quality urine tests, at no cost, as a service to women. A trained Client Advocate can provide additional information relevant to your situation. All of our services are free of charge and confidential.

Make Sure the Pregnancy is Viable
Natural miscarriage occurs in 15-20% of pregnancies. You may qualify to receive an ultrasound from our center or a referral organization in your area. An ultrasound will confirm how many weeks she is into the pregnancy, and possibly, whether or not your pregnancy is viable. One out of every 4 to 5 pregnancies ends in miscarriage; if the pregnancy is not viable you may have no need to terminate the pregnancy. The ultrasounds ACP offers are performed by a licensed sonographer and read by an M.D. radiologist. This service is provided to aid you in making an informed decision.

Be Informed
We are here to help both of you get as much information as possible to help you make an informed decision. If she is pregnant, you are a father and she is a mother. No matter what choice you embrace, you will always be a parent to this baby.

You don’t have to make a decision right away. Gather all the information about your choices – this includes all the challenges as well as benefits. This decision is not easy, but being informed will empower you both in the process.

Stay Calm
Both of you are experiencing a rush of emotions and gut reactions. Though she is carrying the baby, you are both parents now. It is very important to learn and consider all the possibilities and consequences before jumping to a decision. Three lives will be impacted by the decisions you both make.

Be Present

Make sure she knows she is not alone. Be available for doctor visits, classes or anything else. The more involved you are, the more empowered you will feel.

Talk Honestly
It is normal to have many feelings when something life changing unexpectedly arises.  Women often think that the father of the baby wants her to have an abortion because he says things like “It’s up to you” “I don’t Care” “It’s your choice”

Instead, tell her what you think and how you feel. It is very important to be prepared to talk honestly with each other and be prepared to talk with other important people in your lives (i.e. parents, siblings, grandparents, etc).

Adoption
Adoption is a loving way to make a responsible plan for your baby, if you both decide you cannot parent a child. Come in or call and speak with one of our volunteers today to learn more.

Abortion risks
Abortion has many risks. There are emotional, psychological and physical problems. One thing we have learned is that most couples break up shortly after they get an abortion. Feelings of betrayal and hurt, along with grief over the loss of this baby can break up relationships quickly. If you want to remain in a relationship with this person, abortion is going to put your relationship at risk.

Abortion is PERMANENT. There is no “undoing” this decision. Before you make this permanent decision, get ALL the FACTS. Explore ALL your options. We can help you with this.

References:
http://www.priestsforlife.org/postabortion/fathersandabortion.htm